Confessions Session: This One's A Doozy

I'm not even sure what could possibly be wrong with me that would make me tell you what I am about to tell you.

You'll be shocked to learn that it has to do with poop.

So if you're visiting from Our Mommyhood or Blog Brew Review, I don't want to scare you off. Feel free instead to read this episode of Confession Session about motorcycles. Or skip the Confession Session altogether and go for a list of why I'm glad school is out, or read this one about how to use your creativity while disciplining your children.

For those of you who are brave enough - let us venture on...

Okay, so this was over a year ago in December when I was still pregnant with my last child, and my sweet mother-in-law had come all the way from Washington to stay with us and help when the baby finally decided to come. I don't' know how I would have done it without her. She kept the kids here at home while Andrew and I were in the hospital, she took the older boys to school every morning, once the baby came she held him and spoiled him rotten whenever I had to run errands, etc. She even arrived two weeks before the baby came to ensure she wouldn't miss his grand entrance.

There was one occasion though, before the baby arrived, when my mother-in-law's presence was a bit uncomfortable. She had just gone into the bathroom for her daily grooming ritual, and suddenly I had to go bad. I mean, I had to go! Problem is, I have one bathroom and my MIL needed a minimum of an hour and a half to complete her hygiene routine.

Why?

I have no idea. I am clueless as to what that woman does in the bathroom for so long. And about the time that my eyes were watering and I knew it couldn't wait anymore, she had only been in the bathroom for about fifteen minutes.

I stood outside the bathroom door trying to imagine what phase she might be in. The water was not yet running in the shower, so was she undressed and on the verge of getting in the shower? Was she pulling faces at herself in the mirror? Medicating? Trimming her nails? Was she in the middle of silent prayer that she could make it through another day without killing me?

I felt like I couldn't knock on the door and ask her to take a time-out and let me in to do my business because she could be in the middle of something important, or, more realistically, it could take her all of two minutes to re-dress and emerge, by which time it would be too late. I didn't have two minutes.

I was rapidly running out of time and had no options. Baby was weighing down on my colon and I had to take care of business like, yesterday.

My eyes flashed to the diaper changing supplies in the living room...

And I ask you - What would you have done?

********************************************

Be sure to visit Our Mommyhood today, where I have written a guest post that you won't want to miss if you have kids home from school this summer!