Sunday, October 3, 2010

Things That Are Hard To Teach A Toddler

1.  How to arm-fart.

2.  How to blow a bubble with his gum.

3.  How to aim when standing in front of the toilet.

4.  How to put on underwear.

5.  The purpose of a puke-bucket.

6.  How to put on socks.

7.  How to blow his nose.

8.  How to wipe his bottom.

9.  How to fasten a seat-belt.

10.  How to say "frog" without getting disgusted looks from passers-by.

15 comments:

  1. Yes! And, That's Mommy's camera. Not a ball or a chew toy.

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  2. I will try to keep this clean, it is Sunday.
    I wanted to teach my toddlers the correct names of the body parts. My hubby's family had cute names so we wouldn't be embarrassed in public, but when they reached adulthood I wanted to make sure they wouldn't be embarrassed when they didn't know correct words. I had visions of "Oh doctor, Mr Happy is just fine." My MIL taught all her 7 children a danish word that has now been passed down to the great grandkids!
    Anyway back to my sons. I was trying to teach my middle son the "V" word and he could not pronounce it. We practiced but it kept coming out "FINE CHINA" to this day we still tease our son to be careful of the fine china!

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  3. Your son's frog is my son's fork. And yes, they both come out all sorts of wrong.

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  4. Who knew that these things were such essential life-skills?? You don't know what you've got, till it's gone.

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  5. I heart you, Bethany! I could comment on all of these. My daughter can arm fart, but my boys cannot. I don't know how many times my kids have accidentally spit out gum trying to blow bubbles.

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  6. I'm trying to teach my toddler how to blow her nose. I'm trying to get her to realize it's not okay to let the snot run down your nose and into your mouth. Also, it is not okay to wipe your nose on your arm and/or on mommy.

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  7. I'm impressed you have a toddler that can actually chew gum. My kid just swallows it. One pack left within reach at a time.

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  8. I'm impressed that you even give your toddler gum. I'm a chicken. Or maybe I'm just lazy. That's probably closer to the truth! :)

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  9. Why is it so hard to get them to wipe their butts?!

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  10. You forgot one -- how to wipe his booty. :) Now that, was hard.

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  11. Oh number 5 is soooooo dang true! UGH!

    And loved the last one. Trying to get them to say "shirt" is another funny one. Haha

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  12. Love it. Arm-farting is so important. What about burping the alphabet? I really must re-focus my efforts on my toddler's education.
    ps - he calls french fries 'frog fries.' Which I suppose they are. And I suppose the French would take offense to.

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  13. my 5 yr old still can't blow his nose. What gives?

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