My husband and I do not fight. There just isn't much to fight about. We do, on occasion, argue about whether or not Adam Sandler movies can be considered classics, or why he will never play Rock, Paper, Scissors with me to determine who should change a soiled diaper. But that's about it.
Except for that one thing. The one thing that has caused yelling matches on at least three separate occasions. The one thing that neither of us can see a middle ground on. The thing that makes my head feel like it's going to explode from unquenchable exasperation.
This thing:
Andrew's 1963 Volkswagen piece. of. crap.
Andrew bought this gem back in 2003 and it has been a functioning mode of transportation for us for a total of about seven months, four hours, and twelve minutes since then. But not all at once.
You see, the cause of our disagreement over this "car" is that we put five or six hundred dollars into it, and it runs for about three months, and then we put another five hundred into it and it runs for another two weeks, and then Andrew has his buddy come over and look at it and they decide that it needs an entirely new, much bigger, much faster engine in it. Three years later, Andrew confesses that the problem was simply that a nut had come lose on the engine, and tightening it down fixed the problem, but a new motor sounded like so much more fun!
And then it breaks down again.
Andrew reminds me that we have no payment on this car, so five hundred dollars every few months shouldn't be a huge deal. Well, we also don't have a car with this car, so I call bull, and we end up pulling hair and throwing punches and biting until we're too exhausted to go on.
Ok, not really, but I think that after "discussing" the VW, we both feel like decking each other. For real.
The most recent "discussion" on this topic happened about a month ago when Andrew and I were budgeting our tax return. I saw no point in throwing away another chunk of money, and he couldn't understand how I classified that money as being "thrown away". I asked him if there was an end in sight? When will the madness end? If he has to pay $2K to get it running again and it only lasts for six months, THEN can we call it quits? Please??
He called an end to the discussion.
And finally, after all these years, I can say that I am the one who has decided to admit defeat. It's as if a light has been turned on inside my head and I can now see that Andrew will never be able to see this rationally. He is beyond reason, beyond help, just beyond. And if it's that important to him, then I have to give. I have to let it be, let it go and make peace with it. And I have. I know that I will have to live with this car for the rest of my life, and I ought to quit letting it take years off of that life.
But there is one area that I am not willing to give in. Despite how it looks in the above picture, that Bug is PURPLE. Not blue. It is metallic purple, and anyone who has seen it in person would agree with me. Except for Andrew, who insists that it is blue. Well, yeah, but only at certain angles. That car is purple.
My husband loves his purple car. And I love my husband enough to force my brain into it's happy place whenever we have to talk about it.
Something about those Kestner boys and their bugs. They got it from their dad. One of my few memories of Mike in my youth is him picking me up from elementary school in his bug and me feeling soooo cool that my BIG brother could drive
ReplyDeleteAND that he would pick me up after school. I got to ride in the "back back". Which translates to the little well behind the back seat. I did fit! He'd open the sun roof and he'd drive me home, waving to all my little friends in the little back window, green with envy, as I rode off in the back back.
Maybe that will help just a little.
I agree. It is purple. He should make it a good, solid, power blue if he's going to keep it and work so hard to keep it runny. I mean running. Lol!
ReplyDeleteI went through my own personal hell with Kamaki and his stinking 1975 Chevy Blazer. I think he paid $3000 for that truck, and then dumped another $25,000 into it's bottomless pit of never-ending repairs. He would sink a ton of money and time into the thing, then take it 4-wheeling ONE TIME and destroy it again.
ReplyDeleteI thought I would be ecstatic the day that he finally decided to part it out and get rid of the beast. But you know what? It was actually really, really sad watching him tear apart something that he loved so much and had put so much blood, sweat, and tears (okay, the tears were mine) into. He still misses that thing.
But yes, Andrew's bug is purple. :)
Ha! Its purple. I cannot begin to tell you how much i admire you for caving in like that. I couldn't do it, i simply couldn't.At all. I don't like cars that will break down every few months, and i don't like spending a enormous amount and going into debt on a silly car. I don't think its worth it to be honest. I would be way too stubborn in getting rid of that car. All the worries, fighting, etc. I hope Joel and I never cross that road, though I'm pretty sure we will. He's just as stubborn as i am, if not worse. So we'll see who wins if we come across something like this. :)
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